Above, from last night's launch party for my adorable friend Mary Rambin's new brilliant handbag line - Moe - www.moebags.com.

Miss Mary will be in the ABC reality show, "One Ocean Drive," airing at the end of the summer, and her younger sister Leven is an Emmy-nominated actress on All My Children, so there were an appropriate number of model-fashionista-reality types there, although, to be honest, I didn't recognize any of them.

Since I offered to be Mary's Cheerleader-Cum-Fake-Publicist, I harassed invited a bunch of media types (with a promise of free bags!). Of course, no one showed but my college roommate, confirming my suspicion that I have negative clout and/or people delete my emails before they read them.

Well, Media Types, know THIS: uh ... I won't be giving you any inside gossip on One Ocean Drive!

Okay, I don't really have any. But if i did ...

Anyway, the whole point of this absolutely illiterate piece is that HER BAGS ARE FRIGGING AMAZING, they will CHANGE YOUR LIFE, and if you don't already own one, GO BUY ONE RIGHT NOW!!

Maybe I do have a future in Fake-PR, after all.