I Give Up!
Sooo ...
Today, let's discuss the subject of self-promotion.
I do a lot of it. Not well, obviously, because people continually find me obnoxious while I tend to think of myself as charmingly self-deprecating. Which just goes to show the difference between self-perception and reality.
Occasionally, I put myself in other people's shoes and rethink my methods. For example, just this weekend I removed all of the photos from my website, including the egregiously ... egregious ... homepage photo. I'm not sure exactly what I was thinking when I used it in the first place - I suppose it seemed like a good idea at the time. Hell, Jessica Cutler has a giant photo of her boobs on her website. What's so wrong with typing on a laptop in your negligee?
What's wrong with it is that it's really fucking annoying. It's like when you and your girls are out and you see another girl dressed in a ridiculously non-existent outfit and you're like "You're not even that hot. Seriously. Tone it down." And maybe you're just being bitchy, but you have a point.
It's one thing if I were one of those girls who only hangs out with guys and steals boyfriends, but shockingly, I'm not. I'm actually a girls' girl, and although most of my friends say that they didn't like me at first (at least they're honest, right?), I am, more often than not, considered good company "once you get to know me."
So I'm issuing in a new era of Julia Allison, a "toned down" version. A subtle version, although I've been subtle maybe three times in my life, and two of them were when I lost my voice.
We'll see how it goes, but in the meantime, cut me some slack. It's hard out therrrrr for a clichéd dating columnist.
Especially one who makes really old, lame jokes like that. Sigh.
